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About two months ago I was asked if I would like to play cards with a group. The group consist of ,2 brothers and their nephew whom are retired fireman and nephew is active chief the others are all long time friends. The house we play at is the retired CFO that my wife has taken over his CFO position. I have never known any of them before playing cards with them. The ironic thing to me is the man that has been greeting me with the "Hi worthless" was actually my most likable one in the group but of course has become one of my least now . I am the type of person that would never call someone worthless . He as only started saying this the last 3 weeks, it makes me angry inside to be insulted in this manor.




in General Psychology by (120 points)

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2 Answers

Are you used to being in situations with male friends? Is there a chance that you are confusing classic machoism with offensive language? Many men pick on eachother and call eachother names and demean echother with words, but it is a form of male bonding. If this man is calling you that, but is not giving you other reasons for you to believe he dislikes you, then he just wants you to know he feels close enough to you for that sort of dialougue. My friend and I often exchange comments reffering to eachother as homosexual, such as, " shut up you fag" or, "if you take the c*ck out of your mouth, I could understand you." You respond in kind to show him your respect and that you can take the bullshit, because you know its bullshit. If he holds the door open for you or something say," I do like to see a lady hold the door open for a man like that." Or if he calls you worthless again you might say," is that what your boyfriend says to you when he throws a towel at you?" And then follow it up with the body language of telling a good joke.

If he is being serious and is showing actual disdain for you, call him out on it. Take catherines suggestion into consideration.
by (540 points)
Be honest.  Tell him how his greeeting makes you feel and ask him to stop.  I can imagine he will say he is just kidding and you need to lighten up.  Do not engage in discussing this,just "be a broken record," and tel lhim that his greeting offends you and please stop. Keep doing that, keep on point, stay calm.  Stick to your guns!  This is abusive and you need to advocate for yourself.  You would tell hin to stop if he punched you in the nose each time you saw him, wouldn't you?  Well, he is punching you verbally.  Tell him it hurts and stop.
by
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