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My little sister is giving birth to her first son this month. In December my wife and I said that we were thinking of coming up over the weekend the same time he would be born. This was so that we could be there to congratulate them on this special occasion and maybe catch a glimpse of the baby. He said that would be wonderful. Since then I have been told emphatically by my mother and sister that they do not want anyone there. They will let us know when we can come and visit. It turns out that my father was there as well as my step-mother to welcome the baby into the world and give my sister support.

The reasons I was given is that my sister does not want the pressure of people there because she doesn't want to feel she needs to entertain guests. They live about 3.5hrs from where we live. I respect her need for control and space, but I still can't help feel upset over this. We were never told nicely either, as we were prepared to take time off work and drive all the way out there to see her. We even mentioned this fact but were told in no way were we to come. Am I right to feel upset over this, or, as my mother said to me:"Get off my high-horse!"

Appreciate any info on this.

Marc




in General Psychology by

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1 Answer

Thanks for the input Catherine. I feel that for family one shouldn't have to ask for permission to join them on such a wonderful occasion. From the start they have been quite rude about it. When I said that I was going to pop in for a minute I was met with stoney silence. Then I relented and said I wouldn't, then all I heard was how relieved they were. If they truley wanted space then no one except themselves (mum and dad) would be there? Surely?
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